April Fool!


We can neither confirm nor deny that the following essay fell out of a fifth-grader’s notebook.

Presidents Pierce, Buchanan, and Garfield were all log cabin Presidents, but Lincoln is the greatest because he was born in a log cabin he built with his own hands.

Lincoln was a lawyer who never told a lie.  He told jokes instead and got the jury laughing.

Lincoln wore a top hat so people would recognize him after he grew a beard.  Nowadays we are used to seeing him without a hat, but when his picture first appeared on the five dollar bill, people said: “Who’s that?”

Lincoln and his 1860 opponent Stephen Douglas were both from Illinois.  They both courted the same woman, Mary Todd, but she chose Republican Lincoln because she didn’t want to be a Democrat First Lady and then run for President herself.

Lincoln never got to see the end…

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Happy Birthday Sandra Day O’Connor!

Retired Justice Sandra Day O’Connor celebrates her 85th birthday today.  She’s most notably known for being the first woman appointed to the U.S. Supreme Court.  But we’ve learned1 of another accomplishment: she is the first2 Justice to dated another Justice.  While in law school she and William Rehnquist had a short relationship.

1. From a pair of bobby socks she wore while at Stanford Law
2. That we know of. Justices Alito and Scalia’s socks response was “no comment.”

Something In My Shoe Today



There’s something poking my foot today
It’s been bugging me all day long.
Not big enough to cause dismay,
Just enough to feel it’s wrong.

I have on shoes I seldom wear
Cause I’m dressed up for a meeting.
Lucky for me they are easy care
And slip off with no one seeing.

I rub my foot on my other shoe
In hopes this stops the jabbing.
Next I twist the shoe for a quick review,
To end the persistent stabbing.

Alas there’s trouble with my sock today
Cause there was nothing in the shoe.
I pull and twist my leg in lithe ballet
Seeking a better view.

Drat, it must be in my sock today
Deep inside the cotton fleecing.
I plot my move to slip away
To turn it inside out for shaking.

I’m feeling so much better now
The irksome itch has departed.
For when I shook…

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Happy Birthday Harry Houdini!


Born Erik Weisz, Harry would be 141 years old today.  But the famous illusionist couldn’t escape death, which came on Halloween 1926.  Nothing could hold the great escape artist, including tanks of water, milk jugs, handcuffs, or coffins.

But did you know that he has had a sock named after him?  The Houdini sock is a special knitting technique that encloses the sock with no way in or out!  If you’d like to knit a pair of your own, you can find the pattern and description here. 


The Secret (Socks)


I know there’s a book called The Secret out there. Please tell me it’s about how to wear, and keep in place, secret socks.

Seriously, there is more to the secret of these little fabric foot pouches that simply not seeing them when wearing shoes. Although, and I kid you not, I have seen somebody wearing them with sandals. Best not go there.

Today I’ve got a pair on my feet. I won’t say I’m wearing them, because while they are on my person, they are shifting around in my shoes, moving towards my toes where they will bunch up and have me grinding my teeth within the hour.

I don’t even know which way round they go, as in do I have the heel part over my toes, or vice versa? For crying in a bucket, how difficult can it be to put them.  I’m an adult for goodness sake, you’d…

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The Sock Thief

221b Banter Street

I don’t like to over exaggerate, but I think it’s an understatement to refer to “the curious case of missing socks” as anything less than a worldwide pandemic. My hate for the ghost of the sock drawer has always been pretty high, but over the last three weeks he (men always steal so it has to be a man) has messed with my head too much and it’s time I acted… by blogging about it.

Being efficient with my budget I set out to the “shop of dreams” (Primark) and invested in 7 pairs of socks, but these socks were no ordinary socks, they had the days of the week on them! That way I thought I would never be out of socks and I could plan my daily foot warmers efficiently and effectively.

Monday: I wore my Monday socks. Put them in the wash.
Tuesday: I wore my Tuesday…

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